21 October, 2007

Damn...

Damn...I don't even know what to write. I am a realistic, even optomistic person, in most areas of my life. When it comes to sports, however, I am usually very negative. My roommate and another one of my good friends are Red Sox fans, yet I said nothing when we led 3-1. Why? Because of tonight... and Mesa, Red Right 88, the Drive, the Fumble, the Shot, the Move, the Disaster in the Desert, etc, etc, etc. Let's face it, being a fan of NE Ohio sports is a succession of kicks to the groin. The worst part is the pain. Yeah, this sucks. I want one Cleveland team to win a championship before I'm dead. And for two weeks, I've had to listen to BoSox fans whine about their past, when they have 2004, Tom Brady, Bobby Orr, and the Celtics. We had Jim Brown, who retired before my mom and dad graduated HS. We have LeBron, who shows up cheer against his hometwon team and taunt his own fans. And we have pain...I wear it like a badge of honor...it, in a perverse way, shows my loyalty and the loyalty of the Cleveland fan. The Red Sox have some true fans (my two fans are die-hards) but that bandwagon is on the verge of collapse from the weight. The true fans will not taunt, but those goddamn bandwagoners will. Bandwagon jumpers are like child molesters and snitches in prison...the lowest of the low. And damn it, I know it's only sports, but this is not fun. You know, I'm almost 28 and it seems like this builds every year. The Browns suck, the Tribe chokes, the Cavs ahve regressed, and do you really believe in the Buckeyes this fall? I still don't, but my teams beat me down. I can't even get excited, because when I do it all crashes down again. I remember '97, when my buddy Dan and I discussed our celebration after we won game 7. You know the story, unfortunately. My father is 58 and a life-long Tribe fan, and I now wonder whether he'll ever see a World Series title. He likes to say it doesn't truly matter, but I recognized the pain in his voice during this latest collapse. I know when Cleveland breaks its curse, I'll celebrate for an entire week....but until then, it's sorrow. I recall a movie (don't remember which one at the moment) where a major character talks about missing pain once its gone. Well, I almost revel in the pain, which shows I've truly suffered as a Cleveland fan. My friends who are not NE Ohio fans don't get it and don't understand why I was so negative....maybe now they do. All I've wanted is to watch my teams, and enjoy or suffer through it all. But to have to hear it...and not from the loyalists. Do some people live just to talk shit? I tell myself someday, and there's always next year....but after this ALCS, I'm not sure there is. Someone is always destined to lose, and apparently that is our destiny, as we are from Ohio....

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